


Remembering hurt, but she couldn't bring herself to forget.

by Unstoppabletogether



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Angst, But they still got "married", Character Death, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Some Fluff, Suicidal Thoughts, The bomb went off, Yall its way too late and im way too tired and i wrote this anddddd its sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:07:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22085374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unstoppabletogether/pseuds/Unstoppabletogether
Summary: The bomb went off, and now he was gone.
Relationships: Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago
Comments: 6
Kudos: 52





	Remembering hurt, but she couldn't bring herself to forget.

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Suicide. If this triggers you in anyway i recoomend u don't read. Hpwever it's only for a bit at the end
> 
> If not, pls enjoy. This is just an amazing way to start the year. I tried my best

_May 15, 2019_

She missed him. Holt had given her the day off and Charles had offered to bring her out but she refused. Honestly, she didn’t remember much of the last year. Screaming(A lot), Crying( Even more), not very good memories. God, she could remember that day like yesterday. 

_May 15, 2018_

_“And do you Jacob Peralta, take Amy Santiago to be your wife?”_

_“I absolutely d-”_

**_BOOM!_ **

No. They said not to think about it. She shouldn't. With a groan she pulled herself out of bed. She made her way to the kitchen and stared wistfully at a picture of them on the kitchen counter.

_“Our first anniversary, what should we do?”_

_“Jake, we’re not even married yet.”_

_“Aren't you excited though! One year later, and we could be standing in this exact spot, only difference is we would be married! FOR A WHOLE YEAR!”_

_Amy grinned at her_ ~~_boyfriend_~~ _Fiance’s playful grin and couldn't resist a smile of her own. He smirked and leaned forward from his spot on the couch to plant a firm kiss on her lips. She returned it quickly, attempting to deepen it._

_“Did you just take a picture of us?” Amy pulled away as she heard a camera shutter click._

_“I couldn't resist, it was such a perfect moment. One day before we get married!” He defended, holding up the picture for her to see._

_“That’s an amazing picture, we should frame it.”_

Shattered.

She glanced down at the picture, tears welling up in her eyes. She knew she should clean up the glass but not now, not today. Instead she admired the way the sunlight bounced off his hair, their obvious grins as they kiss, they looked so happy, so **oblivious**. 

_“I’m so glad we’re not doing that stupid groom can’t see the bride thing.”_

_Amy giggled, setting down her morning crossword._

_“Why?”_

_“Well because I get to do this.”_

_He leaned forward, pressing his lips firmly against hers. Just as she started to kiss him back though he pulled away._

_“I like teasing you.” He grinned._

_“Oh come here you fool.”_

Everything in this house brought back another painful memory. 

The stove: _“Aww Ames, your cooking is horrible but it's the thought that counts.”_

The couch: _“ Ames why don't we move this is the bedroom?”_

Their wedding invitations: _The bomb._

She needed to get out of here, grabbing her coat she ran out of the door, her cup of coffee long forgotten. 

~+~+~+~

She hadn't thought, just drove. But now she was here and she couldn't leave. She had only been here a few times the past year, she couldn't bear being here for too long. It was like she was finally accepting it, that he was gone. 

She made her way towards him. She was nervous, coming here has never ended well. As she reached the grave, she couldn't help but cry at the words engraved under his name. 

**“I do.”**

_May 15, 2018_

_Amy groaned as she came to, wiping dust and debri off her .She could feel a heavy weight on top of her. What the hell happened?_

_And then she remembered._

_An explosion coming out of the vents, screams filled the air as the ceiling collapsed onto them, someone jumping onto her…._

_“JAKE!”_

_She pushed the body on top of her to the side, wincing as she heard his head collided with the floor._

_“Oh god...I’m so sorry.” She whispered, wiping away some blood from his face, “Jake?”_

_She shook his body endlessly, trying to ignore the small pool of blood forming around him._

_“Jake Peralta YOU BETTER WAKE UP RIGHT NOW!” She screamed, trying her best to hold back a sob. She slapped him on the cheek a bit harder than intended but it worked. Jake gasped as he springed awake, groaning he felt the burns on his back._

_“Oh thank god,” Amy panted leaning down to check his pulse, way too weak._

_Jake saw the look on her face, and judging by how much pain he was in, he was definitely **not** going to make it. _

_.“A..ames.” Jake wheezed, “I..I love you.”_

_“Jake..don’t talk to me like that. It’s just a few more seconds ok honey? I’m sure someone else has called an ambulance.” She tried, looking up, she finally noticed that the rest of the centre was completely covered in debris. She knew she should be worrying about her other friends, and family but the selfish part in her couldn't find herself caring. Because all that mattered right now was her best friend_ **_and_ ** _family, lying here on the ground covered in blood._

_“I..I'll call an ambulance. Just, hold on ok? I promise you we’ll get through this.” Amy comforted(More herself than him)._

_Jake gave her a sad smile and reached for her hand._

_“No,no,no,no” Amy sobbed, shaking her head._

_“Ames, please… let me say this.” Jake tried, fighting against every part of his body that told him to go to sleep. Amy sobbed ,clasping his hand in he’s, blood mixing with her seemingly endless tears dripping on the floor._

_“I didn’t.. Finish, just now.” He choughed, firmly gripping her hand in his,giving her the most loving look he could,_

_  
__“I...do.”_

_May 15, 2019_

She sobbed, clutching the dirt beneath her feet as she stumbled to the floor. A life without him wasn't worth living. Having to wake up to an empty bed and a silent house wasn't worth going through life. How'd she manage to survive an entire year without his delicious pancakes or his sweet kisses or his beautiful smile was a mystery to her. Remembering hurt, but she couldn't bring herself to forget. A huge chunk of her life was gone and she wanted it back. She could get it back.

_“Fitting.”_ She thought _, “If we both died on our wedding anniversary.”_

She couldn't help but laugh at the twisted irony. She took off her coat and flung it on the floor. Reaching into her pants pocket she pulled out a small container of pills. She took a lot of them in the past year. 

_“I’m sorry Mam, He didn’t make it.”_ She got the prescription.

“He will be missed.” Two pills.

_“I loved Jake like a son…”_ Three pills. 

_“You are now officially Amy Santiago-Peralata..”_ Five pills.

And then there was the intervention. Sure it helped, having her friends there, but it still hurt. And now it could all go away. She could see him smile again. Hear him laugh. Kiss him. It wasn't a hard decision, and when they find her body, she will be smiling, because she can finally see him again. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I hoped you liked it! Kudos and comments are greatly appreciated. If u have any b99 prompts feel free to comment. 
> 
> Until Next time! :p AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR


End file.
